Tuesday, May 12, 2015

In Which This Is All So Very Bittersweet

My fingernails are shot.  To the quick.

Broken and peeling all over the place.  Down to the nubs.

Not 'cause I'm nervous.  Nope.  It's been because I've been working those babies {and the rest of my bones} to the bone.

Literally.

The last month has seen me trimming and digging and hauling and planting and spreading all things dirty and life-giving in springtime's soft breezes.

Scrapping and peeling and stripping wallpaper, warm glue-y water running down my outstretched arms.  And the spackling.  Oh the spackling of those million little nail holes where all my kitchen collectibles used to hang so proudly.

Decision making, scads of choices each day from the smallest details to the great earth-shaking ones have left my brain a bit be-fuzzled.  Did I tell you that Home Depot's our new best friend?  And that we've lost count how many times we've traveled out 44 to the hardware store?

Sorting and boxing up and bagging and delivering hundreds of objects that I'm not using, not loving, not keeping.  Hundreds.  The resale shop, library, thrift store, and auction house rub their hands with glee as they reap my losses.

Updating and organizing and rearranging.  And oh ... the cleaning.


Everything.  Except the painting.

The man did that ... and ALL of the heavy lifting, relentlessly plowing through our seemingly endless must-do list, keeping us laser focused and moving ahead like a speeding freight train coming 'round the bend.

After 38 years, we're moving on, friends.  

After spending pretty much our whole adult lives here in NY, we are headed to our beloved Cape Cod, Massachusetts shoreline.  We're off to do the next season of life in the haven of rest I have cherished since I was 7 years old.  My parents and sister are nearby.  A little house seemingly designed for us, the place of His choosing, nestles on a quiet wooded street eagerly awaiting our upcoming permanent arrival.

My emotions are so very mixed.  It's all so bittersweet.

We leave some very dear friends here.  It's been hard for them watching this all unfold.  I know it.  They've told me so.  I see it in their eyes.  Every minute we've shared in recent days, every conversation has meant the world.  I cherish these people.  To say that I'll miss them would be a ridiculously vast understatement.

We leave this beautiful valley where the man and I grew up together as husband and wife, have experienced our greatest highs and the deepest lows.  We've raised our girls here, welcomed our grandbabies through the doors of this very house with wide open arms.  And said tearful good-byes to far too many friends who headed off to other vistas from this very transient area.

But it's my counseling clients that I'm most concerned about.  My pastor's heart just loves these courageous, insightful women.  Together, we've ventured down into the scariest pits and reached up to heaven's heights in their paths toward healing, wholeness, and growth.  Sending out all those letters explaining what and where and when was the hardest task in this whole transition process.

I've been counseling for 13 years.  Can you begin to understand how torn I am with leaving this ministry that's nestled so close to my heart?

Pray for these dear women as I help them transition.  And if you have any prayers left over, I could use some myself.

Bittersweet this is ...

The house goes on the market.  Next week.






*

THE TRANSITION JOURNEY ~ AN UNEXPECTED SERIES






*

P.S.
Would you accompany me on my transition journey?  I would so love for you to be a steady companion along the way.  You can subscribe here.

P.S.S.
traveling with Kelly  *  Mary  *  Holley  *  Lyli

60 comments:

  1. Sending up prayers for you as you enter into this next phase of life, Linda. I can imagine how bittersweet it must be, but I'm confident God has wonderful plans for you in the future. Thank you for sharing. Blessed to be neighbors at #RaRaLinkup.

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    1. Yep, He promises that He has plans ... and that truth gives me peace. And makes me smile!

      Thanks for your encouragement, neighbor ...

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  2. I am excited to hear God has you on a new journey Linda! You must post beautiful pictures from the beach and share with us on the beautiful rhythms of the ocean. Saying goodbye is tough, we did that 7 years ago, but now, I wouldn't trade where I live for all the tea in China, so to speak. This is now home. Praying you have a safe journey to your new adventure!

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    1. That you've been there, done that, encourages me, Nicki! And yes, there is a beautiful life-giving rhythm to the ocean that feeds my soul deep.

      Trusting Him for it all ...

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  3. I have traveled this road too, Linda. It is survivable--but TOUGH! Prepare yourself--and KNOW He will be by your side every step of the way. Praying for you, your friends, and your client as you venture over to Egypt. Remember Egypt is beautiful too!
    Blessings, Dear Friend!

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    1. Don't you just love that He already knows every step? Sure does take the pressure off ...

      Thank you, Lulu ... you are a faithful companion in my life! I'm grateful for your presence, week in and week out.

      ;-}

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  4. Praying for you, thinking of you, hoping for you, loving you... You are so dear to me, and so is Creekside. You will always have a special place in my heart!

    Walking alongside you, Linda, as we journey in parallel with Him...

    Always,
    Alicia

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    1. You, my dear, are an absolute sweetheart! Yes, yes, we are journeying in parallel with Him ... and each other!

      Your words are life-giving and kind.

      'Blest be the ties that bind ...'

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  5. Sad but exciting. My life's motto: Live the Adventure! What an adventure God is taking you two on now. I, of course, would like to be kept up to date Linda.

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    1. Yay! Live the adventure! I need that man's perspective, friend.

      And your pastor's heart surely understands where I'm coming from. That I know.

      I appreciate that you're here, Bill. Greatly, brother!

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  6. It's hard to de-personalize a home before putting it up for sale, isn't it? And then to leave behind all the dear friends and places where memories were made? The longest I've ever lived anywhere (as an adult) is five years, so I can only imagine the process after 38 years in one spot! Many blessings as you begin this new chapter of your life, Linda.

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    1. 5 years, huh? Wow, Lois, you are courageous. And maybe a bit of an adventurer like Bill was just talking about!

      The best part of the whole house thing has been the staging of the rooms. You can tell I watch alot of HGTV! I've had fun pulling things together to look inviting and homey, but not personalized. Let's see if it works!

      ;-}

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  7. I'm so proud of you and Tim for doing all that's required of a move--not just of a house, but of a lifetime, Linda. I wish that Gary and I were as far along as you. For whatever reason, we have let the project be pushed off over and over. But I also hear your sadness--this bittersweet parting. I wish I could give you a big hug and have a cup of coffee or tea with you while you take a break from it all! I'm sure you need one! Thank you for taking us along on this journey. I pray it is a good one--one that I've been praying for you about for months or maybe even a year now. Hard to believe it was almost a year ago that we visited your beautiful home in the woods. But I bet those mornings on the beach and those sunsets over the sea will be a big comfort and reminder that the Lord goes with you wherever!

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    1. Your zeal for prayer, dear Beth, inspires me ... and surely reaches His tender heart. That you have been so faithful in lifting me up is a beautiful testimony of the depth of your faith in Christ.

      I am beyond grateful that He has brought us together over the miles. You've been one of blogging's most cherished gifts to me.

      My gratitude overflows ...

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  8. Hi Linda! It's a hard time, and I'm so sorry for your broken heart having to leave so many people who need you. And our personal histories are strong, rooting things. It's hard to uproot them and move on. But if anyone can make good of this transition, it will be you. Thanks be to God that you have family to support you, and a husband who is your partner in every sense of the term. Try not to miss all the precious feelings as you travel these days, the ups and downs. Journal if you can. I just think this will be a formative, transformative time.

    My prayers are yours.
    Ceil

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    1. That you've shared your wisdom here is such a treasure, Ceil. Yep, I'm journaling up a storm ... don't you love how God cares about all those big AND little details in our lives? Writing them all down allows me to see them for what they are and release them to His care.

      ;-}

      And this - 'our personal histories are strong, rooting things.' So well said, friend. These roots go deep, real deep. Thank you for making the truth of that clearer to me.

      Where would I be without you shedding light, His light?

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  9. Linda,
    Praying for your ladies and for you...these changes and transitions in life aren't easy...even if we are looking forward to the destination! You have been a good and faithful servant shepherding these hearts and their lives will be forever changed because of how you let God work through you. Wishing you all the best in your new home up north. Me, I headed south lol. Remember God has already gone ahead of you to prepare a place for you there...
    Blessings and prayers,
    Bev

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    1. My clients are responding to this news in the loveliest, most gracious ways, Bev. Thank you for praying for them ... for they are HIS and not mine!

      And yeah, transitions can be toughies ... change happens in a blink, but navigating all its bends and turns is a bit more complex!

      So glad you're here, friend ...

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  10. Bittersweet is the perfect word for this transition. Yet, I know that God has beautiful things in store for you and He is able. He brought your counseling clients to you for a season - He took care of them by doing that. And, He will continue to care for each and every one of them - perhaps through your ongoing touch from a distance or perhaps in ways we can only imagine. Our Father's heart is for them and He will care for them . . . and for you . . . each step of this transition.

    He has so much in store for you in the days and years ahead - new friends, new people who need your special touch, and dear ones you've known so long who need your special touch in a new and different way. Oh, yes, He has much in store for you.

    Praying with you through this transition . . . much love to you and your lovely family!!!

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    1. Beautifully said, Dar. Our Father's heart is for each one that we care for ... and no one understands and ministers to our deepest needs better than the Creator Himself.

      I so appreciate your thoughtful words ... they have offered me such grace this evening! Thank you, thank you!

      ;-}

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  11. Prayers are traveling with you dear friend! It seems that you and I are both sharing a bittersweet moment right now. So many emotions and so much to look forward to. I look forward to seeing some beautiful Cape Cod scenery in your pictures. Love you and your heart for making sure everyone is taken care of.

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    1. Yep, we're arm in arm in this season, aren't we, Mary, as we both leave our loved and oh-so-meaningful work and venture ahead to what's kind of unknown.

      I love that we're doing this together, friend. I feel so much less alone talking to ya ... and He's going to guide us to opportunities that just might be 'more than we ask or imagine.'

      ;-}

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  12. big deal here. this task of downsizing, even though we may not actually move is next on the list for us too....and I am watching from a distance. Please share this journey with us, yes...i am along for the ride.
    love to you and the man.

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    1. Downsizing is such a huge deal ... until you start eating that elephant, one simple piece after another. Yes, it is doable! And if we don't take care of our overload of accumulations, the gruesomely huge task will fall on some other unsuspecting soul, usually our kids.

      Gee ... what a legacy, huh?

      Just one layer at a time. That's all ...

      ;-}

      Glad you're walking with me, Carol!

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  13. Oh, my dear, dear, friend! Prayers you will need indeed, on both ends of this adventure. And mine you have. I read something this week that may encourage: "God will never take you anywhere He hasn't prepared for your arrival." I'm delighted to walk alongside you in prayer during this JOurneY!

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    1. Your prayer support is accepted with open arms! Thanks, June, for traveling this new pathway with me.

      We're not meant to go alone, are we ...

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  14. Oh, dearest Linda. I have been thinking of you since receiving your email yesterday and reading this post. I can only imagine the mixture of emotions. You will indeed be in my prayers as you make this transition. I will also pray for your clients. What a blessing I am sure you have been to them over all these years.
    And Cape Cod . . . I am sure to visit there one of these days as it's on my bucket list so I will be looking forward to the day when I can hug you in person. :)
    Always coming along side of you on your journey!
    Much love.
    xoxo

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    1. I LOVE that you've gotta bucket list ... you're such a youngster, girl! And I'm glad the Cape is on it! My home is your home, ok?

      Thanks for continuing down the road by my side ... you're a terrific cheerleader!

      RahRah!

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  15. It's going to be difficult, but it sounds like the right thing to do! You're in my prayers.

    As for your counseling clients, beware of the feeling that you are the only person who can help them. That's pride. Turn your prayers toward guiding them to other people who can help them even more. It'll be hard, but I think it's the only way.

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    1. Great point, Becca! I learned long ago that I'm not the Savior of the world! At the end of each counseling session, I literally release my clients to the Lover of their souls in prayer. And He has proved faithful, faithful, faithful!

      A sign of a good people helper is knowing when to refer. Anyone who's working with others should have a well-worn list of other professionals to create a well-rounded healing team.

      Thank you for your wisdom, friend! Your words are a good reminder to us all ...

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  16. Linda,
    How very exciting to experience this change yet be so ambivalent about it at the same time! A few years ago I moved across town and sold the sweet little bungalow I dearly loved to move a few doors down from my sister so I could be close to my niece and nephew. Even though I wanted this move, I cried for the first month because I missed my familiar stores and surroundings! Our human natures are so perplexing aren't they?! :) But with your counseling background, you will be better equipped than I was! I am looking forward to accompanying you on this journey as I read about all God has in store for you in your new place of promise, sweet friend! :)

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    1. Well, it ain't no jaunt to Italy like SOME people are planning! But our upcoming adventures both share some of the same qualities ... anticipation, apprehension, curiosity, joy. Faith-stretchers these all are!

      My mom's dad was from Italy, so I look forward to hearing about your artistic endeavors and explorations there.

      Travel light ...

      ;-}

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  17. Prayers are going up for this sweet/hard season in your life. It is like having empty nest all over again but you know if God says to move on He has it all in control. It speaks to what a good counselor you must have been because you care so much !!! Blessings on your move. Visiting from Holley Gerth Link Up.

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    1. Wow, you said it all right here, Rebecca ... 'you know if God says to move on He has it all in control.' And all I can say is amen. We've just gotta follow where He leads and pick up our feet when He says it's time.

      There is no other way to peace, contentment, and joy. Thanks for your sharing your wisdom here! I so appreciate your presence ...

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  18. Sounds Scary! Oh dear, I can only imagine how you feel.
    Be encouraged and strengthened in the Lord.
    God Bless

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    1. Nope, not scared. Expectant, hopeful, peaceful.

      And grateful for all He's done and will keep on doing ...

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  19. Awww! Wow! You are on your way to some much needed rest after all that it sounds like! Prayers coming your way that God will bless this new season! Visiting from Holley's link up ♥

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    1. I think I finally finished all the cleaning for now.

      Whew! I never was real enthusiastic about dust clothes and scrubbing, ya know?

      ;-}

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  20. That is amazing! Congratulations on your move! (And thank you for proving for my family by shopping at Home Depot) ;)
    I know it is a big deal, but if God wants you there, it will all work out!

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    1. Maybe Home Depot will hire me now that I know where each and every item is located!

      ;-}

      haha

      Delete
  21. Linda, I am so happy to have found your blog at Thought Provoking Thursday! You have captured the angst of moving into a joyful provision while leaving behind the sweet connections that spell blessing and safety.

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    1. And you have crafted my heart-words into glorious prose. And for that I thank you, Michele!

      Welcome to Creekside!

      ;-}

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  22. Oh, wow! What a huge change for you, Linda. Your new journey will be exciting though, being reunited with your parents and sister so close by. Yet the leaving is never easy either. Praying for you, friend, and your clients!

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    1. To have my parents and sister not all that far away is such a huge joy to me, Lisa. I can't even begin to tell you.

      God is so good and I am grateful beyond words!

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  23. Friend, letting go of a lifetime is a hard hallelujah. May He give you comfort and courage, and may you find joy in your new home. Hugs

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    1. 'letting go of a lifetime is a hard hallelujah.' Wow, Lyli, you've captured where I am. Eloquent and perceptive you are.

      I'm glad you've dropped in today. You have left a sacred benediction in your wake ...

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  24. I can only imagine how difficult it must be for you to make the transition! The longest I've ever lived in one place was 11 years, and I still grieve occasionally over the community we left--even while knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that God has us exactly where he wants us. Prayers and hugs for you, my friend!

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    1. What you say about grieving over lost community is so important, Anita. It's not just saying good-bye and moving ahead to the next thing. Any loss deserves to be acknowledged, understood, and released so we can fully move ahead with joy and health and sanity.

      Thanks for bringing this important consideration to the table, my friend! And your prayers mean the world.

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  25. Glad to have "found" you today! I'm your neighbor over at 3D Lessons for Life . . . my family is also preparing for a time of transition and it is definitely a bittersweet feeling (lived here for almost 33 years--was born in RI and now live with my Mom with my husband and 2 little ones :-). We are excited about where the Lord is taking us and the ministry that He has for us, but it is difficult to leave things that we have loved and known. Blessings and grace to you . . .

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    1. We move forward together, Rebekah. I'm glad God led you here ... it's kinda nice to know that I'm in good company ... you get that whole bittersweet thing, I can tell.

      Grace and peace, dear.

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  26. Sending you prayers as you move into the next place and position God has planned for you.

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    1. Well thanks, Donna. I trust Him completely! And I'm glad that you're here today. I appreciate the support, truly.

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  27. Congratulations on this exciting yet emotional transition. We look forward to how God continues to use you in this next phase of life. Onward to the Cape!

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    1. There's a room waiting for you guys ...

      Onward and upright, right?

      ;-}

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  28. Hey Pal--- words can't express how I feel but how excited I am for you both. Your roots will now be planted in the cape, a place you love. I continue to pray that God will protect your roots until he re-digs them into your new neighborhood. I moved 7 times in my life and I grieved each place (except one). That proves we long for a place to call home---one day we will all be hanging out in our eternal home together!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hooray!

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    1. Hanging out in our eternal home? Worshiping around the throne?

      Now THAT'LL be a move to remember!

      Thanks for going the long haul with me, Carol. I know this is hard.

      ;-{

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  29. I know the bittersweet emotions all too well. That pain in your friends' eyes that is often reflected in your own as the time of leaving nears is at times almost unbearable. I will be praying for you and your husband on the next leg of your life's journey.

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    1. The eyes speak volumes, they let us peer deep into the heart of another. Or our own heart if we gaze in the mirror long enough.

      Painful, yes?

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  30. God always has us just where we need to be at the perfect time. New normals are so hard, I know I'm giving advice to a counselor here, but try not to go with what you know once you make the transition. If you have to, limit the time you are allowed to do the things you used to do. It will help with transition. Listen to what God has for you in your new season and lean into Him. Then, run to that. It will be so exciting. Blessings

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    1. It's not easy to step outside of my very comfy comfort zone! New situations and new people and new opportunities are big leaps of faith for this ol' introvert! So I really appreciate your words of wisdom, Kim,

      Thanks for that gentle little nudge. I'm going to take it {and you!} with me!

      So grateful you're here, friend ...

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Welcome to the table, friend!

This is where we gather and hang out. I'd love for you to pull up a chair and jump right into the conversation. Or simply say 'hello.'

l'll be dropping in to visit you sometime soon ...

Linda

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