5 Truths My Clients Have Taught Me

Life is filled with milestones to be observed and celebrated.  These line-in-the-sand landmarks always present an opportunity to sit back and review, reflect and express gratitude ... and consider what might be on the road ahead. 

I'm celebrating a decade in my role as a pastoral counselor.  And I'm smiling, inside and out!

Back in July 2002, I set up shop in our living room.  The personal stuff was moved out and those prized, hard won diplomas and certificates were set in a place of honor.  My husband was banished from the house when appointments were scheduled.  It wasn't long til I was asked to serve on a church staff as a 'counselor for pastoral care,' and did so for five years.

In the fall of 2007, the creation and birth of the Creekside ministry center was a sweet miracle of grace and joyous redemption from the hand of God.  A long held dream was realized ... to offer hope-filled, healing conversations from a pastoral perspective in a beautiful, safe, peaceful environment.  It was truly one of those 'immeasurably more than all you could ask or imagine' experiences {Ephesians 3:20}.

All I can say is it's been a trip.  A real journey.

I'm not the same woman and I'm a very different counselor than I was back in 2002.  Lots of reasons come into play.  But perhaps the biggest game changer has been the impact that thousands and thousands of hours of conversation with many hundreds of clients has had on my life.  In a nutshell, here's just a sampling of what I've learned:

1.  There's No Immunity
I've talked with clients from 14 - 84.  They've come from endless, fascinating cultures with the broadest array of experiences, challenges, and pain.  But no matter where they find themselves or how they spend their days or how much cash they've got in their pockets, whether they're people full of faith or those who shake their fist in God's face ... when all is said and done, life happens.  And absolutely no one is immune from emotional trauma, grief, unexpected events, family crises, or serious illness that can pull the rug right out from under us.   

2.  Big Courage is Required
Let me put to rest the myth that people who go to counseling are weak.  It takes an inordinate amount of strength to admit you need to talk with a professional.  Tenacity to find the perfect fit with the counselor who has the proper training to match your needs ... and a true connection to your soul.  And raw faith and endless trust to allow that counselor to lead you through your stuff, week in and week out, so that you come out on the other end so much better than when you started. 

3.  It Takes a Team
While counseling conversations are 1-1 and confidential, healing doesn't come in a vacuum.  Together, counselor and client create a healing team that comes alongside as she moves through the tough times.  Safe, caring family members and friends, experienced medical and legal professionals, ongoing support groups, effective community services, church resources, and online help all come into play.  We don't heal on our own.  We were created for community.

4.  It's a 24/7 Deal 
A motivated client is not content with 1 hour of work a week.  An emphasis on caring for her body through healthy eating, exercise, rest, and a new work/life balance are all on the table.  Consulting with her doctor, taking needed medication as prescribed, and creating a space to meet with God on a regular basis are vital steps in moving ahead.  Those who follow up on assigned reading and journaling, who begin to set up wise boundaries and take concrete steps to reach their goals ... these are the ones who mend, who grow, who heal.

5.  Wounded Healers Emerge
God doesn't bring healing so we can simply wander off and put our feet up and be happy.  The goal is always to take the lessons learned and the strength and wisdom gathered to bring something of beautiful, healing substance to others.  To be so restored and so grateful and so wise that grace and hope can be offered to others who are broken ... that is when the client knows she's come full circle.

I honor you today, all who've invited me to sit and be present with you in the stark reality of your pain.  To leave no stone gently unturned as we've walked slowly but surely through the dark and scary places into the healing light and freedom that comes through Christ.  To banish the lies that have hindered, to discover the power of forgiveness, and embrace new ways of looking at life and relating to others well.  And ultimately, to claim the joyous potential of inviting our Redeemer to restore 'the years the locusts have eaten' {Joel 2:25}. 

Thank you for allowing me to champion your healing, pray you through each setback, speak the hard truth in love, and celebrate your victories.  When all is said and done, God is faithful and He is good. 

Anticipating what He has in store for us all ~
Linda

- photo by blessedchild -