Monday, March 31, 2014

Wrestling with Those First Books



I've always been a New Testament girl. 
 
Born and bred.  I love the stories of Jesus, the letters of Paul.  They speak deep into my soul, there are whole passages of Scripture that I lean into with all my mind, soul, and strength.  Heavily.  Words of trust and peace flow from the sacred pages into my journaled musings, holy words woven into the dailyness of life, the breath I breathe.
 
I'm aware that the Spirit mysteriously weaves the beautiful strength of God's Word into counseling conversations with passages spoken from somewhere deep within my being.  Golden words that talk of the power of the fruit of the Spirit in our lives.  Needed calls to speak the truth in love and forgive yet again and to let our 'yes be yes' and our 'no be no.'  Warnings about the danger of making decisions from a place of fear or reconciling without wisdom.  And compelling invitations to trust deeply in the midst of pain.
 
Healing words that meld together, streaming powerful redemption light to life's tragic brokenness, long hidden secrets, and paralyzing shame.  For we so badly need that freedom from the chains of sin that hold us hostage to the past.

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Truth be told, I am not an Old Testament girl. 

I love the deep treasure troves of Psalms, Proverbs, and Ecclesiastes.  But honestly?  Everything within me cries out against the violence within so many of these early books of Scripture.  There is much about the actions of God that I can not wrap my hands around.  And passages that I simply shy away because I don't have a clue what's going on.  The history gets away from me, leaving my eyes a bit glazed over, with lists and laws, kingdoms and battles.

But that huge section of Scripture has been placed between those leather bound pages for a reason.  I know that there is a whole picture that must be viewed.  There is a complete story that must be told.  Because the powerful beauties of redemption that I so deeply embrace call for a magnitude of reasons why that redemption was so necessary in the first place.  And purchased at such an unfathomable price.

And those stories of our ugly, sin-filled natures, that part of us that shakes our puny fists in the face of a mighty God, do not make for easy reading, do they.

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I just finished reading the Old Testament today. 

It took many months to read through this section of the Word.  God knew my heart when He led me there, and He had some lessons in those 1429 pages for me to grab hold of.

Lessons like not picking and choosing which books I want to embrace.  You get the whole package, whether you understand each detail or not.  Lessons like trusting the character of God more implicitly than ever, even and especially when you just can't fathom what He is allowing or what He is doing.

Discovering what faith looks over the long haul ... the evidence of things hoped for, not seen, not understood, not easily handled.  That's why it's called faith.  For He is God and I am not.  He gets to call the shots, orchestrate the big picture, create the final game plan, know the end from the beginning.

I don't have to understand every nuance along the way.  But love Him more than ever, stand on His holy Word, cherish and trust His mighty justice and lovingly wise character? 

An unqualified yes.  From somewhere deep and strong inside this New Testament girl's oh-so-grateful heart. 

And someday I'll see Him face to face.  I will fall down and worship the triune God with everything in me.  And He will gently take me by the hand and make all things clear to this trusting soul whose wrestlings have only drawn her closer to Himself.

 
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*   sharing faith with Laura  .  Beth  .  Kristen   *

24 comments:

  1. You know, Linda, when I was watching that Noah movie a thought occurred to me, "How is the story of the great flood like Jesus' redemption story and salvation of us all?" I think that's what has gotten me more interested in the Old Testament (since it can be a bit dry, especially through Leviticus) is thinking about how it relates to Christ. And I'm with you, girl, on not having a clue sometimes. But grateful that God doesn't let that stop us from experiencing more of Him. Love ya!

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    1. Thank you for this wisdom, Beth. I will keep this question on the table for when I want to grasp on to what God is inviting me to. And it's always something deeper, something more holy.

      Iron sharpens iron, doesn't it ... thank you for speaking into my life, dear sister.

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  2. Such dear reflections you've shared with us, Linda. So thoughtfully and beautifully written. Thank you for sharing your journey through and with the Word.

    I have so much yet to read (both OT and NT), but what wonder I've already found... I could mull over those opening chapters of Genesis for the rest of my life, they're so fascinating. Without them, the NT story of redemption would have no meaning -- because we could not begin to fathom how much we have lost (since the Fall), and why our need for Christ is so very great...

    Looking forward to new wonders ahead as I continue to read and hear God's Word. Thank you for inspiring me to keep going!

    "And God saw everything that He had made, and behold, it was very good and He approved it completely..." What a testament to our Creator's love and His great power to save!

    Blessings,
    HBHW

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    1. As I read those opening chapters of Genesis this week {in prep for going to see NOAH}, I will recall, I'm sure, your love for that first book, dear lady. You have spoken often of your fascination with the word of God revealed in those holy pages, and have blessed me greatly with the depth of your passion for Him.

      I hope you are well ...

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  3. I appreciate your honesty and your willingness to push yourself through a part of the Bible that you don't find easy! It is easier to just not do it, but then you miss such great examples of men who do what God wants them to do, even though they don't understand why or feel they are incapable of the task. Moses, Noah, Joshua, Joseph, Job - they trusted though sometimes they were skeptical of what they were being asked to do. Human characteristics!!

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    1. Thanks for bringing up the truth that the great men {and women!} of the faith often expressed their doubts and fears and failings. I believe that God smiles during our Doubting Thomas experiences, because He knows that He is quite able to use them to bring us closer to Himself.

      Thanks, Marilyn. I'm glad you are here today.

      Hugs.

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  4. It's much easier for me to read the New Testament too and hear about Jesus' grace and see the healings, etc. But the Old Testament does hold treasures of its own, even though it requires me digging through a lot of stuff that I can't explain (or necessarily enjoy). I'm currently in Leviticus and all those laws feel so oppressive just reading about them. Trusting that God knew what he was doing then though, just like I trust that he knows what he's doing today still! Have a great week, Linda.

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    1. Oh I am so grateful that Christ has freed us from endless lists of do's and don'ts! I am saddened when I see brothers and sisters still tangled up in legalistic posturing and maneuvering. It is for freedom that He has set us free, and the joy we experience by embracing Him, pure and simple, is astounding.

      Yes, yes, Lisa. Trusting in the depths of His wisdom. Amen.

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  5. When I finally figured out the entire Bible was about redemption it became much easier to read through those begats. I now find some of the OT stories deeply touch my soul. What a treasure God gave us with this account of Who He Is!

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    1. I'm surrounded, soothed, and greatly encouraged by the wise words you're all sharing with me today. And isn't that what Christ-honoring blogging's all about? Thanks so much, Lulu, for adding your wisdom to the mix. I so appreciate that you're here!

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  6. There is a lot of difficult stuff in the Old Testament, isn't there? But, as Lisa says, so much treasure too. I'm glad God took you on this journey, Linda, and gave you all these sweet rewards you mention here.

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    1. And the journey never ends, does it, Laura ... until we reach heaven's home. The sweet rewards He's given lets me know that He loves me, despite my wrestlings. Or even, dare I say, because of them?

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  7. Congratulations. This is a great accomplishment and one which has been beneficial! I'm in the midst of doing the same thing. I'm a little over 1/3 of the way through. It's a long process, but is exciting to fully engage in the entirety of God's Word in a special way.

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  8. Looks like I'm in good company! I worked through the books chronologically which was helpful in getting the big picture. I can't wait to hear of your progress!

    ;-}

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  9. I'm slowly working my way through the Old Testament. It can be so hard and at times I want to give up but like you said, there is a reason it's there and I'm going to keep on reading. Along the way I just allow Him to let me know what verses, chapters or books he wants me to gain new wisdom from. Thanks for this post today, friend. I hope your week is off to a good start. :)

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    1. You're right, Beth. This is not a quick read. And so often we want to just cruise through the things that are substantial and worth sitting with so we can move on to what's easier for us to digest.

      Thanks for jumping into this conversation today, friend!

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  10. I'm afraid I start and stop with the Gospels. I have what my wife calls a Crocodile Dundee faith..."God and Jesus and all the apostles, they were all fishermen...just like me. Yep. Straight to Heaven for Mick Dundee. Me and God...we'd be mates."

    I did try to delve into the OT, and it very nearly unhinged my belief. There's a lot there - like "kill all the Amalekytes" - of which I've seen modern versions, and which have made me doubt God's purpose. A pile of dead kids in Peru is a pile of dead kids in Nicaragua is a pile of dead kids in Bible Lands. And I can't abide that.

    I had to do a spiritual core dump, and focus on the Jesus of the Gospels to regain my bearings. No more experimentation...He's good enough for me.

    http://blessed-are-the-pure-of-heart.blogspot.com/2014/03/marriage-and-loyalty.html

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    1. I love that God is right there when we have those 'unhinging' moments, Andrew. In our doubts He is still quite present, and not at all scared off by where we're coming from!

      May you find rest in Him alone. Thank you for sharing yourself in this place ...

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  11. I love seeing God's power in the old testament. I feel protected when I know He is with me and He is not a wimp. It also scares me a little knowing if I'm not on His side, then I'm screwed.

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    1. Ain't that the truth, Jenny. A holy fear and awe can be a very good thing. Because without Him, we are nothing.

      Thanks for dropping in today. Welcome!

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  12. The Old Testament can be hard to read in parts (though I am funny, I love Leviticus) but it is foundational to the NT. Jesus is all through it and so is the blood. Like you, I love Psalms, Proverbs, and Paul's Epistles.

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    1. Hey Judith ... While I can't claim Leviticus as my top 'go-to' book, there are so many that I love, lean into, cherish!

      Thanks for coming by tonight. And welcome!

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  13. I'm so glad you did this, Linda! I can remember the first time I studied the bible from cover to cover. Oh, what a precious picture of our Lord and Savior we have in the OT! It was like filling in the details on a painting. Meeting Jesus in the OT and following Him through His sacrifice and return is a very special journey indeed!

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    1. A journey. Perfect said, June. That it has been. And we continue forward, going deeper, getting stronger, and growing more and more in love with our Savior.

      I love Him so ...

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Welcome to the table, friend!

This is where we gather and hang out. I'd love for you to pull up a chair and jump right into the conversation. Or simply say 'hello.'

l'll be dropping in to visit you sometime soon ...

Linda

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